Monday, January 4, 2010

Determined? Or stubborn?

Tonight I picked up Ben from the sitter, made dinner , took Ben to Target to buy trains for his new train table, cleaned the kitchen, reorganized the play room and assembled the train table.


While Brian slept. (Yes, night shift sucks.)

This is not an uncommon or uncharacteristic occurrence. I consider myself determined. And driven. And definitely goal oriented.

Once I declare that I'm going to do something, I usually do it.

This is a good thing, right?

Or am I really just stubborn. and borderline OCD?

As I write this, I'm starting to thing they're flip sides of the same coin. And what I really need to do is find balance. I'm getting better at saying "no" and being clear about what I can and can not do.

But what I think I really need to work on is being still. Letting some things go to make room for the things that bring me the greatest peace. Like foregoing laundry for reading every once in a while. Or sitting down to dinner with Ben instead of switching between him and the dishwasher his entire meal.

Of course, I'll never give up multitasking or be able to veg for an entire Project Runway marathon again (ahhh, college). But maybe I'll make an effort to actually nap while Ben naps. Or only watch TV not just listen to it whilst I tidy and fold clothes.


Is it a bad sign that I'm getting antsy just thinking about it?

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